I've been very contemplative today. All the Cotting folks leave in the morning and Melika and Esthephania are headed out on Monday. I think watching their good bye process has me thinking about mine - even thought it's more than 3 weeks away. The fact that there are many, many things up in the air at Galloway, and I'm feeling more than a little disconnected, if not guilty, about leaving Peter & Co. in the midst of it all.
Seems like on days like this, everything becomes a message from the universe. One of the first songs that played on my ipod during my run this morning was one I would have sworn I'd never heard before - doubtful since *I* put everything on it. So it's 5:45m, the sun has been up over an hour, and I'm hitting the first hard part of my route. Thinking about how I want to continuing doing things like I'm doing here for the rest of my life. Wondering what that means. How will a life like this effect/reduce/eliminate other things I'd also like to have in my life? Also wishing I wasn't thinking about the future and able to just live fully in the now, as Melissa Ethridge belts out:
Don't be afraid
Close your eyes
Lay it all down
Don't you cry
Cant you see I'm going
Where I can see the sun rise
I've been talking to my angel
And he said that it's alright
I've always had to run
I don't know just why
Desire slowly smoking...
There's something waiting out there
That says I've got to try...
I can feel the thunder
Underneath my feet
I sold my soul for freedom
Its lonely but its sweet
Don't be afraid...
This song was followed directly by "Moondance" - my all time favorite song for its lyrics but mostly for all the many beautiful people and experiences I've associated with it.
More conversations with angels are definitely in order. Luckily, I am blessed to have a life overflowing with them!
Thursday, July 2, 2009
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